As a dating coach, I hear this sentiment all the time: “There are no good men/women in my town,” or “The ratio of men to women is terrible where I live.”
Now if you live in a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, there might be some truth to this, but most of you live where there is no shortage of eligible men and women. Honestly, no matter where you live or who you are looking for, if you know how to harness the law of attraction; you will find your ideal partner. The Universe will find a way for you to meet.
WHAT IS THE LAW OF ATTRACTION AND WHY IS IT SO IMPORTANT?
Simply put, it is a universal law that says we will attract into our lives what we focus on. Whether it is positive or negative, whether you are aware of it or not, every thought you have and every emotion you feel affects your reality.
If you have been hurt by a past relationship, if you are frustrated by the dating process, if you have a bad attitude in general about dating or relationships, you will continue to draw those experiences to yourself. It is as if potential partners can see your beliefs written on your forehead. There really is no way to hide it. The good news is you are in control of what comes into your life. Once you learn how to use the law of attraction, you can manifest the partner that is perfect for you.
IT ALL STARTS WITH YOUR THOUGHTS.
This is where the true power lies and is the start to any successful dating experience. You first have to know what you want to attract and then believe it is possible to have it. Changes start by becoming aware of your prominent thoughts. I suggest you spend some time making a list of all the thoughts and beliefs you have about dating, men/women, and relationships. Write down the good and the bad thoughts. This will give you an idea of which ones need your attention. Remember, you get what you focus on. How often are you thinking thoughts that are not taking you in the direction you want to go? Probably more often than you realize.
The next step is to write down a list of empowering thoughts. Empowering thoughts are the ones that make you feel good, motivate you, and make you feel more confident. It is time to start changing your beliefs and you do that by changing your thoughts; one thought at a time.
Some ideas to get you started:
- I am in the process of attracting the right partner for me.
- The partner I seek is also seeking me.
- I am relaxed and have fun on dates.
- I am closer to finding my soulmate every day.
- I open my heart and trust that love will follow.
- With new tools and skills, I create a different relationship experience.
- There are loving, caring, faithful partners and I am one.
When you are focusing on empowering thoughts, don’t limit them to dating and relationships. Be sure to look at how you feel about yourself. How can you attract an amazing partner if you don’t feel amazing about yourself? It is time to make a list of all the things that make you a great partner. What do you have to offer? When you are aware of your strengths, you will date with more confidence and will allow your authentic self to show through. It is time to love yourself!
Here are some ideas to get you started:
- I am worthy of love.
- I am confident in what I have to offer a partner.
- I effortlessly radiate positive energy.
- I am comfortable with who I am.
- The more I love myself, the more I attract my ideal partner.
- I am loveable and worthy of receiving love.
Not that long ago, I was single after being married for 28 years. The idea of dating was scary, but I was determined to have love in my life again. I knew there was another love out there for me and I would find him. I was not sure when or how but I knew I would be successful, and I was.
I am now happily remarried because of that belief!
IN ORDER TO ATTRACT YOUR IDEAL PARTNER AND HAVE THE RELATIONSHIP YOU DESIRE, YOU MUST FIRST BELIEVE YOU CAN HAVE IT!
The next step is to be able to hold on to that belief, even before it shows up in your life. One way to help you stay focused on the outcome you are looking for is to write it down. Be as specific as you can and remember to tap into the feeling of what it will be like when your ideal partner is part of your life. What will you do together? How will you feel? Create an image in your mind that you can see and feel. Now hold that image and spend time with it daily as you plan inspired actions that will put you in a position to meet new people. Keep moving forward holding this vision until you are successful. If you do this, you will find your partner.
Become the observer of your thoughts. Look for patterns, work on replacing them with more empowering thoughts, and take control of your life. I know this is not always easy to do. It might be time to seek out help from a coach. Then watch the magic unfold! When you change your thoughts, you change your life.
Lori Ann Davis, MA, CRS, Certified Relationship Specialist